I was always told that your 40s are the best.

“Just wait til you’re 40,” they said. “It will all make sense.”

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I remember when I hit 40, I thought they were all full of shit.

I was working a corporate job that I hated, dealing with the after effects of the Recession (I lost a house and a business), going through a divorce, and was in a toxic relationship. And then my dad passed away.

I binge drank, ate everything, or didn’t eat in order to cope with things.

I knew something needed to change, but didn’t know how to do it. I know many of you listening right now are white-knuckling it and waiting for the other shoe to drop. You know changes need to be made but are either afraid or are so overwhelmed that you’re putting your head in the sand.

But doing nothing, avoiding or being fearful always results in your shit blowing up.

Growth and making changes is painful and scary. So sometimes we blow up our lives in order to force ourselves to do it.

In today’s episode, I want to share all the beautiful things I’ve learned in my 40s as I embark on my last year in them. All those people weren’t lying when they said your 40s are the best. But it depends on what you do with them.



The thought of change is scarier than actually making the change. 


When you know better, you must do better kind of thing— that has all happened in my 40s and it was messy and scary and lonely and humiliating at times. 


Rock bottom for one person can look totally different from another. 


It’s very hard to make changes when you’re holding on for dear life and just bracing for impact. 


Today is your day to start doing the opposite of what you know to do. 


At the age of 40 years old, there is a lot of freaking baggage and wreckage on top of you. 


The framework of the Enneagram can actually help you get out of your own way. 


I was humbled enough to say “you know what, if I want something different it’s going to require something different of me.” 


It is only in being seen, heard, and understood that you can set yourself free. 


Sometimes you need somebody to light the path for you, for you to keep walking on it.

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